Category Archives: inheritance

“Normal” Life can Change in a Second

We take “normal” life  for granted.

The oncoming car will stay in its lane. The driver behind us won’t ride our rear fender.

The grazing deer won’t run out on the road .

The driver in the weaving car can handle his tire blowout.

The security details at the concert area will prevent a terrorist attack.

“We’ll talk about the details later” Bob had said. “Let’s just enjoy the concert and our Las Vegas weekend. I promise we’ll talk with the attorney next week. ”

Bob had finally taken the time to update his will and estate plan so that it reflected his current marriage to Sheila, his second wife. The updated draft documents  from the attorney were on the living room table. That’s what they needed to discuss, to make sure she understood what was in the plan.

For this couple, next week never happened. Bob is in the hospital on life support, fighting for his life after trying to save Sheila from the savage assault of bullets that rained down on them at the music festival.

The conversation he promised they would have didn’t happen. Bob had delayed for months reviewing the updated will and estate documents.   His first will was still in effect; his first wife and their son had powers of attorney for health care and financial decisions.

At the hospital, the doctors were talking with Bob’s son and first wife. Sheila was not in the loop. If Bob lived, her husband might remain on life support and his first wife would be making decisions about him.  If he died, the current will distributed his assets to his first wife and son. 

“Normal’ life can change in a minute. We have no control except to plan for the things we hope will never happen. Making sure a will is current is one way to do that.

We postpone at our peril and put people we love at risk . Too often, it’s too late.

“Money” Conversation Not About Money

Psychiatrists have long equated the reluctance to write a will, prepare an advance directive or estate plan, with fear of dying.

Who wants to think about planning for death? We have to confront our mortality. No more illusions that it won’t happen to us. We have to face giving up our possessions and power. We have to deal with uncomfortable subjects like aging, illness, death, inheritance and a host of other things we’ve managed to avoid thinking about.

Having the ‘money conversation’ is rarely ‘just about money’. It’s also about family dynamics, mistakes, regrets, guilt, and a host of other issues. Children feel morbid, greedy and intrusive asking their parents questions about money and death. The parents don’t want to start conversations about ‘touchy’ subjects either. The result – people procrastinate, hoping for the best. Hope is not a strategy. It’s a procrastination tool and most often, it doesn’t work.

Click the buy the book button:

www.moneyloveandlegacy.com/

Check out the guide  for opening the conversations that matter between parents and children.Follow the check lists for what parents need to put in place so children aren’t burdened with a financial and legal mess after parents die.

It’s truly an act of love for parents to get their affairs in order.